Sandy Whitehouse

Whitehouse in the White House 08

Sandy Whitehouse of Vail won the lottery in the random drawing to determine the order of names on the ballot. Her name is the first one that Democratic voters will see, giving her a big advantage over the other Project White House contestants.

Whitehouse tells us her last name is her best qualification. Her platform:

Using the same method the current administration does for budget calculations, I estimate that by consolidating the president’s name with the president’s address for the next eight years, we can save enough money on letterheads, invitations and greeting cards to fully fund quality education for all the children in our country; provide excellent health care for our citizens young and old; devise a guest-worker program that will ensure both secure borders and an adequate workforce for our farms and factories; put our scientists to work with fully funded grants and loans to devise methods to stop global warming; and give our firefighters the resources they need to save our forests from wildfires, instead of using taxpayer money to building logging roads. … The only other minor budget adjustment necessary will be to discontinue the current spending spree for atomic weapons, hydrogen weapons, depleted uranium weaponry, germ warfare, chemical warfare, star wars, war profiteers, big sticks, etc., etc., etc.